The right match

This report closes the account of the subject referred to here as F., on Wednesday, October 7, by text message, on the day of the fifth date. No date took place and nothing was spent.

The account opened on September 21, with a message I sent her proposing a date, and ran 16 days. It held 4 dates: September 26, September 28, October 4 and October 5, for 815 minutes and $630.88.

Summary of charges

• Dates held: 0
• Duration: 0 minutes
• Out-of-pocket costs: $0.00
• Amount requested of F.: $0.00
• Follow-up: none

Final, this arc: $630.88 across 4 dates, 815 minutes in person and 16 days. All subjects: $3,676.72 across 3,620 minutes in person.

The fifth date

The fifth date was set on October 4, for the evening of October 7, on a telephone call she asked me to make. On October 5 she proposed a date of her own, at an ice cream shop, and it was added in front of this one without moving it.

It was on the calendar for 3 days and was held on none of them.

October 7

Before the date, she sent this:

“Hi 😊 I really enjoyed getting to know you, but the more I’ve thought about it, I don’t think we’re the right match for what I’m looking for. So I don’t think we should make plans for today or this weekend. I’ve had a nice time getting to know you though and I’m glad we met.”

I replied:

“Ok, thanks for being upfront about it, I wish you the best in your search.”

She replied with a heart emoji.

Words received: 55, and 2 emoji, 1 in each of her messages. Words sent: 15. Nothing in any of the 3 messages is altered.

The plans for today had been made on October 4.

Positions disclosed: 0 and 1. Hers was the message. Mine acknowledged it and took no position of my own.

Limits set: 0 and 1.

That is the sixth account on this site closed, and the first not closed by me. A.’s closed on August 13, B.’s on September 3, C.’s on September 6, D.’s on September 9, E.’s on October 3 and F.’s on October 7.

Up front

On October 2 I cancelled a second date with E., the day before it, in a message that said I wanted to be upfront. She replied:

“Ok thank you for being up front”

Five days later I received a cancellation of my own and replied with the same sentence, 2 words shorter, and a wish for her search. The form for October 3 counted E.’s reply at 7 words and recorded that it acknowledged mine and took no position of its own. Mine is entered here on the same terms.

Her message dates its reason to the more I’ve thought about it, and gives no length for the thinking. Mine to E. said I’ve realized, and gave no date for that either.

Relief

I was relieved. I had also been ready to end it.

The file does not record when I became ready, and I did not say so. It records that on October 5 I considered raising her lateness and did not, and that the limits row on that form reads 0 and 0. It records that the fifth date was still set on the morning of October 7. The message that closed the account was hers.

On October 4 I agreed with her that I have usually been the more emotional party in my relationships, whether or not I told the other person. The relief is entered here as a sentence. The panel has no row for it.

Rationalizations recorded: 0.

Final accounting

• Dates held: 4 of 5 agreed
• Arc length, first message to last: 16 days
• Out-of-pocket: $630.88
• Time in person: 815 minutes
• Cost per hour in person: $46.45
• Travel: 342 minutes of road between us, on 4 dates. Mine 217, hers 125
• Questions asked by me and by F.: 37 and 39
• Proposed the date and chose the venue: 3 dates mine, 1 hers
• Late arrivals, hers: 4 of 4 dates, against the last time she gave
• Phone checks: 1, hers, unanswered
• Contributed by F.: $0.00
• Requested of F.: $0.00
• Cancellations: 1, hers

It is the second largest arc in the file by cost, after A.’s $2,570.94, and the second by dates held.

Costs

• Total: $0.00

Status

The follow-up field reads none. Nothing is owed by either party.

One account is open, G.’s, with a date set for Friday, October 9.

The account is closed. Recoverable: $0.00.