Autopsy · Subject R.
Six and zero
135 minutes at a concert, $148.33, and a question count of 6 asked and 0 returned, 3 days after the only one on this site that ran the other way.
Latest term in the lexicon
verb phrase
Autopsy · Subject R.
135 minutes at a concert, $148.33, and a question count of 6 asked and 0 returned, 3 days after the only one on this site that ran the other way.
Autopsy · Subject K.
180 minutes at The Canal Club, $248.00, and the first question count on this site to come out uneven. She asked 15. I asked 10. I closed it the next day.
Autopsy · Subject S.
60 minutes at a dive bar, $32.00, and a 6 and 6 question count off an evening that was not a date. 3 outings proposed, 0 held.
14 of the 16 cards are still unredeemed. I wrote them, I underwrote them, and since August 18 there is no arrangement left for them to attach to. They carry no expiry date.
Autopsy · Subject M.
No date held. The account closes on day 120 at $2,570.94, 14 unredeemed policies, and a 1-year subscription used for 7 days.
adjective phrase
A closing diagnosis that turns a mismatch into a condition, locates the condition in one person, and spares both people a conversation about the specific Thursday it ended.
Statements in which she accurately described what she was going to do: 14. The first arrived on the second date and the second on the third. After the evening of May 30, which produced 4 more, I held 6 further dates and spent $1,758.00.
Silences longer than 24 hours: 3. They ran 5 days in April and May, 4 days in early June, and 4 days again later the same month. I ended all 3.
Her contribution across 11 dates: $0.00. The column exists because I built the form, and I have entered the same figure into it 16 times.
noun, usually in the phrase 'in rotation'
Portfolio diversification applied to dinners, in which the investor manages several accounts at a level of attention sufficient for none of them and describes the resulting fatigue as abundance.
Phone checks across 1,800 minutes in person: 3, all of them hers. Two were a shift she had missed and a child calling her. The third was on my couch while I cooked, and I am the one who wrote it down.
noun phrase
A holding account where attention is deposited daily at low interest, with withdrawals permitted at any time and no obligation to disclose the other accounts.
11 dates held, 11 of them proposed by me, and 0 of them agreed while both of us were in the room. Every one was settled by text, after the evening it would have been easiest to ask.
noun, also verb
A limited beta release of a relationship, with identifying features withheld so the post can be quietly deprecated if the product fails to find its market.
Arrival times, on the dates where they were recorded: me 15 minutes early, her 10 to 15 minutes late. On July 31 that put 30 minutes between us at a table booked for one time.
Autopsy · Subject M.
No date held. $98.34 of Jamaican food, 45 minutes waiting in 2 mall parking lots, and the first member of her family I have met.
noun phrase
A retail category that sells rest back to people at a markup, with a dating application attached: the belief that the right energy will cause a suitable partner to arrive without anyone having to send the first message.
I bought a year of a couples app on August 3 so that we would have something to answer together, and she joined when I invited her. We used it daily for 7 days. The subscription runs to August 3, 2027.
noun, also verb
A score assigned in hindsight to whichever approach happened to succeed, awarded mostly by people who were not present and cannot explain why it succeeded.
Autopsy · Subject M.
120 minutes at a grill in her area, $135.54. She raised the towel, called it odd, and named the opportunity I had already filed against myself.